o hai. it's january 2023. yeah, i dunno how that happened either, but we're here. let's see if i can try to recap what's been going on since my last post.
i found out that my therapist is leaving their employer and since i'd rather not switch to another provider in that practice, i'll be taking a break from #therapytuesday. we had to laugh about the timing because it happened right after i told them about this whole "open and vulnerable" thing i'm trying to go with during #46andbeyond. i'd be more upset if i was worried about figuring some of this shit out on my own, but i'm not all that worried yet. i like to think that i have a toolkit of sorts to help me deal with my anxiety and stress, even if i don't always use those tools. plus my therapist might open their own practice at some point, so it's not as if i'm done with therapy forever.
i got sick between christmas and new year's, and i'm glad it wasn't covid like it may or may not have been in december 2021. i'd forgotten about my penchant for illness after my birthday - it's like my body said "ok, that's enough fun and shenanigans; now go sit down somewhere" to close out the year. it was kinda funny to your girl because it's not as if i went that hard celebrating my birthday. hell, i left a bar a couple of hours before my b-day so i could be at home on my couch by midnight. thankfully i'm feeling better now, because dealing with constant post-nasal drip and nosebleeds was exhausting as hell.
what else? oh, here's a big one - i'm going to 1st c. in a couple of weeks for a tribute service to bishop. i haven't been back since he died and this year marks the 5th anniversary of his passing and i am absolutely feeling all kinds of ways about it. will it be a shitshow? probably. will someone say something out of pocket about me or carol or someone else i care about? possibly. i'm actually glad this is happening at 1st c. because i know where all the exits are and can get out of there quickly if i have to. i don't think it'll come to that, but i also haven't seen any of these people in damn near five years so who knows what'll happen? i'm already trying to prepare myself for whatever might happen and how i might feel and what i might need afterwards. i also need to figure out if i'm going to join the reunion choir (because of course there's a reunion choir) even though i'm not going to any rehearsals. i don't think i've been in that choir stand since lori's funeral and i honestly don't know if doing that is something i'm built for. also i'm pretty sure very few people will be masked and who knows how many (if any) of them have even been vaccinated.
as you can probably imagine, my brain is having a field day with all of this. one bright spot? none of those people can hurt me, emotionally speaking, any more than they already have or did back in the day. shouts to being a whole entire adult.
speaking of adulting - holy shit meal prep has been saving my life once again. i woke up tired today and was pretty much ready to fall over when i got home after work and grocery shopping, but past me managed to portion out just enough leftovers for tonight so i wouldn't have to cook or think about what to order. the only reason this post is happening tonight is because i wrote most of it while i had some downtime earlier. i'll try to remember to post some reviews if/when i try something new.
hope y'all are hanging in there. here's hoping 2023 isn't a complete dumpster fire clusterfuck.
